Friday, September 15, 2006

A Lowe's by any other name...

Kids: Daddy, where are we going?

Me: We're going to Lowe's.

Kids: What's that?

Me: You know, where you guys ring the door bells and run down the aisle with the lights that turn on automatically?

Kids: Home Depot?

Me: Well, this is like Home Depot.

(we pull into the parking lot)

Kids: Ohhhh, daddy, you meant the Blue Home Depot.

Thursday, September 14, 2006

In my dad's shadow

Recently, my kids informed me of the following:

Kids: Daddy, you're not as tall as Grandpa. He's taller than you.

Me: Yes, he is.

Kids: He's older, too.

Me: Yep.

Kids: He's stronger than you, too.

Me: Yeah, I'll agree with that.

Kids: And he's smarter than you. I bet he knows how fast hyenas can run.

Me, with evil grin: Why don't you ask him tomorrow when he comes for dinner?

Of course, I couldn't let my dad let my kids down. So I called him and said, "Before you come tomorrow, you need to research hyenas and how fast they run."

Tuesday, September 05, 2006

For once, I was speechless...

School is back, for both the kids and their dad. Tonight I was at class, and the evening's discussion focused on two industries.

During the first hour of class we discussed coffee retailers. I had very little to contribute to this conversation. I mean, other than buying an overpriced hot chocolate from Starbucks a couple of years ago, I'm in the dark with this stuff.

The second hour we talked about liquor sales tactics. The discussion evolved/devolved into testimonials from class members about various products and how their marketing campaigns influenced purchasing. To this I had absolutely nothing to add. I asked the guy next to me what the difference was between vodka and whiskey (other than the names and color).

He said, "You don't drink? Seriously?" When I answered that I did not, he nodded and said, "You're lucky. Really. That's awesome."

He then proceeded to tell me that vodka tastes like rubbing alchohol, while whiskey has more of an oak or wooden flavor to it. So, I learned someting at school tonight.